Sunday, August 12, 2012
How To Know if a Man Truly Loves You
Sunday, June 17, 2012
Married or not, must read this Story
When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I’ve got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.
Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?
I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her!
With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.
The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.
In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.
This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that every day for the month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.
I told Jane about my wife’s divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.
My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.
On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.
She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.
Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind…I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.
She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote,I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.
That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed -dead. My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push through with the divorce.— At least, in the eyes of our son—- I’m a loving husband….
The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage! If you don’t share this, nothing will happen to you.If you do, you just might save a marriage. Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up
Muhammad (PBUH) said: “The believers who show the most perfect faith are those who have the best disposition and the best of you are those who are best to their wives.”
“Men are the supporters of women, because Allah has stowed on the one more than the other, and for what they have to provide (for them) from their sources. So the righteous women are obedient and protect in the absence of their husbands that which God ordains to be protected.”(Qur’an 4:34)
Monday, March 5, 2012
A sad touching love story
A sad touching love story contributed by one of our readers. Many times our relationship gets tested and we meet someone whom we thought could have been. Our feelings consume us and it becomes such a difficult situation to get out of. Read this sad short love story to see if you can understand how this reader feels. If you like to contribute your sad love story, please contact me here.
I was in 8th grade when I met him. Well, I didn't actually meet him. But it was quite a funny introduction, he had just moved to my city from California. And it was towards the end of the year, my best friend and I were walking back to class from lunch and we were talking about the new kid we'd heard about all day when we turn the corner and there's this boy pretending to be a dinosaur. I don't know if you could even call it that, but he saying "Rawr, rawr, I'm a dinosaur." So one could only draw a few assumptions. And then it dawned on me that I didn't know who this kid was, and so it had to have been the new kid. It was kind of an awkward moment, the new guy meeting a couple girls in a weird and embarrassing way. But it didn't seem to phase him, he just looked at us and winked. That was just the way he was, it seemed like nothing ever phased him. I remember walking away laughing and my best friend saying something about him being weird. I remember looking back and watched him watch us walk away. I remember being embarrassed that he caught me looking back at him as he watched us. I asked her what his name was and she told me. Max.
So the year ends and I can't remember ever talking to him after that. But I don't really think about him, I've got other things on my mind. First year of high school, volleyball team, football boys, all that stuff. So the new year starts and I walk into art class and realize I don't know anybody. I scan the room and then I meet eyes with him. Max. It's one of those awkward moments when you don't really know anybody else in the class, and you meet eyes with someone you kinda remember only seeing a few times before. You know, acknowledging the fact that you guys both know each other, vaguely, but you have no choice but to become aquainted and quick bc you don't know anybody else really. I survey the rest of the room and walk toward him and his friend and ask him if I could sit with them. He says, yes and pulled the stool out. He reaches his hand out and waits for mine. I must've looked at him like he grew two heads bc he starts to laugh and says that he hadn't quite made the first impression he was going for when he first met me and would like to have another go at it. I stare at his hand for a little bit and then I shake it.
"I'm-" I start as his big hand encompasses mine.
"I know who you are," he finishes for me with an easy smile, that I would later miss.
The moment passes and we became friends. We sat by each other everyday after that, it was just the way it was. He became my best friend, he was there when I needed someone to talk to. Winter break came and went and when school started up again we ended up having majority of our classes together. I remember being anxious to hurry up and just get to the classes we had together. I remember people thinking that we were dating, but we just laughed it off. One time in class Max and I were talking and laughing, and then he left to get something, I think paint. His friend looked at me and leaned over and said "That boy is sprung on you." And I looked at him and laughed, and told him that was just not the way our relationship was and I didn't think anything of it after that.
Then the Winter Formal came around, and the whole night was a mess. My original date went out of town, my new date spilled punch down my dress and then I found him making out with another girl, just my luck. I remember being super pissed off that the night was a complete bust. So I walk into the gym and sat down on the benches, I look over and realize that I'm sitting next to Max's brother and I start talking to him. He was a couple years older than us, and I remember seeing him around, but never really engaging in conversation with him, but we kind of hit it off. I don't think much came after that, but some how I started talking to him more than Max. And soon enough we were dating. My friendship with Max kind of went AWOL, and soon we just stopped talking all together. I remember thinking that I was making a mistake, but Max never said anything to me. If anything he encouraged it.
I didn't put two and two together, I thought we would still be friends. Hell, I thought we would've been even better friends. How stupid could I have been? Max's brother was graduating that year. After he left I was constantly getting hit on since my boyfriend was out of high school. And so me and Max started talking again, and he sort of became my body guard. Nobody talked to me when he was around, and I was okay with that bc I had my best friend back and I didn't want to talk to anybody else except him. He made me a coat rack in metal shop for my birthday. When we talked, it was like we could talk about anything. And we did, we talked about the kind of girl he wanted to be with, we talked about my relationship with his brother, we talked about where we want to be, we talked about life and we talked about the future. If felt good to have him back in my life.
As time went on things with my boyfriend started getting difficult, I started having problems with my best friend and I turned to Max. And he was there for me. I started getting confused, I was bombarded with all these new feelings I felt like I never knew before. But somewhere deep down I knew that they were always there, I just never acknowledged them. I knew that Max had felt the same things for me, although neither of us pointed it out, I knew we both felt it. We were two people who had been put together, but couldn't be together due to moral principles. I felt torn, I loved my boyfriend but I felt like I loved Max too. Somehow, my boyfriend found out about Max and me and things just blew up from there. Some how I felt like a was being ran over by a freight train. I was only 16 and I felt like I had to choose between my best friend and my boyfriend. I felt like I had put myself in a rock and a hard place. Either way I would lose. Either way I would hurt. And I did not want to choose.
In the end, I wasn't strong enough to make a choice and Max made it for us. He wrote me a letter, and had someone else give it to me. In it he told me that he had fallen in love with me and that he had always loved me. But he just couldn't be around me anymore bc he felt like it would only make things harder. He said that he loved me, but he loved his brother too. And that he knew that his brother loved me. He said that he'd sarcrifice everything he's ever wanted so that we could move forward. It said a lot of other stuff, but I can't remember what else. But he must've known how I would react bc his last sentence said "Please don't make this harder than it already is."
I don't remember much after that, I think I blocked it out of my memories. I'm pretty sure I broke down and cried in the middle of class after reading it. I felt like my heart was literally breaking in two. I kept the letters we wrote back and forth to each other for a while, but I think I just chose to lose them. After that we pretty much avoided each other all together, and I'd only see him when I was with my boyfriend or by accident in the hall. I don't think he ever found out that Max knew, and I sure never told him about the letter he wrote me. I remember catching him watching me in the hallway or the cafeteria and our eyes would meet and then shift away. I waited until he showed up, just to watch him and to just see him and know that he's okay. The year after that, he dropped out of school and started drinking and smoking.
I'm still with my boyfriend (his brother), and it's been about 4 years since it happened. And not a day goes by where I don't think about him or I don't miss him. I heard he's with a girl 5 yrs younger than him, and from what I hear she's nothing like the girl he told me he wanted to be with. A few years ago, someone told me that it was my fault that he was the way he is now. That he started smoking and drinking to stop thinking about me. It's hard for me accept that bc he made the decision and he chose to stick to it. And now when I do see him on rare occasion, it's kind of filled with awkward silences. It breaks my heart at how distant we are from each other now. I hate that he's not a part of my life as he once was. I miss him so much, my heart hurts just thinking about it. It breaks my heart seeing him where he is now, seeing him so far from where he wanted to be and not being able to talk to him about it.
I guess love just wasn't enough to save us both. There are so many things wrong with this I don't know where to begin. Don't get me wrong, I love my boyfriend with all my heart and to the very core of my being. But I miss my best friend.
Saturday, December 24, 2011
My top favorite moviee :D

Tuesday, September 13, 2011
its all about heel's :)
hola hola guys, last week i just wrote about my celebration of hari raya . for today its all about heel's. and heel's are only for woman.but i think there's no problem if a guy want to try it. hehe. but sometimes not all girl love to wear heel's and some of them really do love it . and i'm included. so the problem is most of guys not really like when their girls are wearing heel's. because when their gf is taller than him and he probably thinks that 'goshh, i think im smaller than her, what a shame. urghhh' but for girls they wearing heel's because it can make us more confident .



Tuesday, August 30, 2011
salam aidilfitri



Sunday, August 7, 2011
ramadhan almubarak :)
hola hola guys, dh lame xupdated blog woww lots of dusk here . heh XD



Sunday, May 15, 2011
jln2 cari mkn . heh :D







Sunday, May 8, 2011
no love like a mothers love :)
There is no love, like a mother's love,
no stronger bond on earth...
like the precious bond that comes from God,
to a mother, when she gives birth.
A mother's love is forever strong,
never changing for all time...
and when her children need her most,
a mother's love will shine.
God bless these special mothers,
God bless them every one...
for all the tears and heartache,
and for the special work they've done.
When her days on earth are over,
a mother's love lives on...
through many generations,
with God's blessings on each one.
Be thankful for our mothers,
for they love with a higher love...
from the power God has given,
and the strength from up above.


Monday, May 2, 2011
one of my fav story :)
hola guys , topic for today is missing a person that u love :)
hari nie jiwang skit ye. heh one of my fav story is about love. and here a some story that i will like to share wif u guys. hope u like it :)
You never know what you have until you lose it, and once you lose it, you can never get it back.
The worst way to miss someone is when they are right beside you and yet you know you can never have them.
Love is missing someone whenever you're apart, but some how feeling warm inside because you're close in heart.
I might not get to see you as often as I'd like, I may not get to hold you in my arms at night, but deep in my heart I know that it's true. No matter what happens... I will always love you.
I'm holding on to something that used to be there hoping it will come back, knowing it won't.
If you love someone more then anything, then distance only matters to the mind, not to the heart.
I want to be with you tonight, tomorrow, and today it can't happen now but it will someday.
Nothing hurts more then waiting since I don't even know what I'm waiting for anymore.
And if you were to say 'come with me', even now I might go.
I have waited for you for 2 years and I will wait for you for the rest of my life. Even if that means I have to give you up for the rest of my life, I will wait for you. I love you that much and nothing will ever change that.
Can miles truly separate you...? If you want to be with someone you love, aren't you already there?
You know you love someone when the mere thought of losing them brings you to tears.
I wish that I could hold you now... I wish that I could touch you now... I wish that I could talk to you... be with you somehow.
Distance between two hearts is not an obstacle... rather a beautiful reminder of just how strong true love can be.
A lot of people walk in and out of my life, but... you're one of the only ones I ever really wanted to stick around.
Just because I moved on doesn't mean I won't be here if you change your mind.
Maybe he's doing the same thing as me... maybe he wants so bad to call me, but just won't because I haven't called him... then again, maybe I shouldn't fill myself with false hope that he might just be missing me like I'm missing him.
You asked me what was wrong, I smiled and said nothing, when you turned around and a tear came down and I whispered to myself... everything is.
I sit here and wonder if you'll ever understand just how much of me belongs to you.
I don't miss you: I miss the person I thought you were.
I'd be happy to come back to you... except it was you that went away.
I think its time I let you go... and that is hard to do because part of me will be in love with you for the rest of my life.
Good-bye's make you think. They make you realize what you've had and what you've lost, and what you've taken for granted.
Good-bye is only truly painful if you know you'll never say hello again.
Never long for anyone from the past. There is a reason why they never made it to your future.
Goodbyes always hurt whether it's the right thing to do or not.
We'll do what we gotta do, see what we gotta see, and if in the end we end up together, then we'll know it was meant to be.
Late at night when all the world is sleeping, I stay up and think of you... and I wish on a star that somewhere you're thinking of me, too.
Even now after all this time, you called me and wanted me I'd say "yes! It's about time what took you so damn long!".
You do something to me that I can't explain, so would I be out of line if I said I miss you?
The few hours I spent with you are worth the thousand hours I spend without you.
This is out last goodbye... it's over, just hear this and then I'll go; you gave me more to live for then you'll ever know.
Missing you isn't the problem, it's wondering if you'll ever come back that's killing me.
It's been quite awhile... I must say I miss our friendship. I miss you, but what I really miss the most is not just you or us but how it all was.
I miss the talks we used to have, I miss the voice I used to hear... I miss hearing your crazy but cool stories, and above all these... I just miss you!
I ofter catch myself constantly wondering how you are, sitting alone with my mind set so far, reminiscing about your smile, voice and touch, damn this life... I'm missing you too much!
I get this feelings we'll be together again. No straight lines make up my life, all roads have bends. No clear cut begging's and so far no dead ends.
Today was just one of those days where everything I did reminded me of you and every song I heard somehow related to you. I hate days like today, because they remind me of the one thing I dont have.
I called because I wanted you to know that despite everything that' happened and all the miles between us right now, I still think about the way it was in the beginning.
If some thing happens and you lose me, please don' think that' the end, come and find again.
I know you've been busy, I had things to do too. We haven't talked for some time, I wonder if everything's fine. I had other stuff on me mind, I'm sure you did too, but I just had to tell you this my friend... hey I miss you.
People that are meant to be together always find their way in the end.
We've gone our separate ways and I know it's for the best, but sometimes I wonder, will I ever have friends like you again?
I miss all the little things. Like him driving with his hand resting on my knee and the way wed share a big gooey ice cream. But I especially miss the hot nights in those motel rooms when he was all around me, the taste, and the scent and the feel of him. And Id fall asleep in his arms, with the sound of his heartbeat being the last thing I heard before going to sleep. I ache with longing.
I've been laying here all night, listening to the rain. Talking to my heart and trying to explain. Why sometimes I catch myself wondering what might have been. Yes I do think about you, every now and then.
In this weird twisted way, I know you miss me liking you, not because I want to believe it's true, but because you'll never find a girl that can put up with you like I did; you'll never find a girl who will care as much as I did, because no one will waste all there love on someone like you, like I did.
If you missed me then I'm sorry I didn't stay away longer, I like being missed.
Just the thought of being with you tomorrow is enough to get me through today.
It's YOU. You mean everything to me... you are the first thought in my head in the morning when I wake up; my last thought before I go to bed. You smile at me in my dreams... when you are sad, I fell sad, and when I see your true smile, I feel incredible, like there is no other thing around and all I can see is you.
The best feeling in the world is to be millions of miles away and still be able to picture his eyes.
Sometimes, no matter how much faith we have, we lose people. But you never forget them. And sometimes, it's those memories that give us the strength to go on.
I tell you goodnight with tears in my eyes, I wish I was there curled up by your side, Time passes, But not fast enough, I try to be strong. But I'm not that tough, When I feel you embrace it will be all right, But my heart aches for you on this lonely night.
When I'm not there... do you think of me? When you're sad and something's bothering you... do you wish I were there to help comfort you? When you've had a long hard day... do you smile knowing that soon you'll be seeing me, and everything will seem better, even if it's just for a moment? When you lay down at night... do you look back and cherish the new memories you've made with me? And when you get up in the morning, does everything inside of you smile, knowing that this will be another day that we'll be together? because that's how I think of you...
I can still remember just the way you taste.
I want to be in your arms, where you hold me tight and never let me go.
Hug me when I'm there, miss me when I'm not, kiss me every day, and love me for all eternity.
If home is where the heart is, then wherever you are, that's my home.
I just want to hug you, but your are 480 some miles away, what I wouldn't do for a hug.
I wish that you were here or that I were there, or that we were together anywhere!
Before I sleep and after I wake up and all the hours in between ... you occupy my mind. So, practically every moment of the day you are in my thoughts. I miss you.
When you feel alone, just look at the spaces between your fingers, remember that in those spaces you can see my fingers locked with yours forever.
Each time I miss you, a star falls down from the sky. So, if you looked up at the sky and found it dark with no stars, it is all your fault. You made me miss you too much!
Missing someone gets easier everyday because even though you are one day further from the last time you saw them, you are one day closer to the next time you will.
I miss you most when I'm sad. I miss you when I'm lonely. But most of all, I miss you when I'm happy.
I am here and you are there - one of us is in the wrong place!
Sometimes I miss you so much, I just want to rip you out of my dreams and hug you!
Not being able to hold you has got to be the hardest thing I've ever had to do. But I get to look forward to the next time you are in my arms; your smile only inches away from mine getting closer and closer until at last... our smiles meet. Something that beautiful... that's what keeps me going.
I miss the way you used to hug me, I miss the way you used to kiss my lips, but most of all I miss the way you held me and my heart. I miss you...
What I have with him is worth it. It is worth every lonely night, every tear I cry from missing him, and the pain I feel from not having him close. It is worth it because he is my one and only. When I picture myself years from now, I see only him. No matter how painful distance can be, not having him in my life would be worse.
If my heart had wings I would fly to you and lie beside you as you dream. - Faith Hill
Late at night when all the world is sleeping, I stay up and think of you. And I wish on a star that somewhere, you are thinking of me too.
It's not a 'good-bye', only a long 'I'll see you later.'
When I miss you, sometimes I listen to music or look at pictures of you, not to remind me of you but to make me feel as if I'm with you. It makes me forget the distance and capture you.
No matter how far you are, no matter how long I'm gone, you will always be with me. I will see you always as clear as day, for our love knows no boundries and never will, because you see... our hearts are one, and mine is always home.



Saturday, April 9, 2011
photoshoot at taman botani :)




Tuesday, March 8, 2011
jogging sambil photoshoot :)
thnx a lot fy. really appreciate it. fyi, fy really do love in photography so much. and she now still learn about photography. and i wish all the best for you yeah. hopefully u will be a famous photographer one day . :)
so as u all know. one of my hobby is doin photoshoot . and last saturday , yna and kwn2 yg laen g jogging smbil photoshoot . here some pictures . heh :)




